One morning as I was mopping the floor with all the sweat dripping all over my skin, hubby went down from our bedroom with Y. Forgetting to bring our baskets of laundry upstairs, I immediately asked him, “Paki-akyat ng baskets tapos paki empty na rin after.” Then without preamble hubby answered, “Wala man lang kalambing lambing.”
I got pissed off at his comment and instantly I thought to myself, “What?! You’re expecting me to say it sweetly when I’m all tired and sweaty cleaning the house? Instead of appreciating what I do, you were complaining about my tone? I can’t believe you!” I didn’t blurt it out of course, for all I know I’m just being emotional.
After my annoyance faded I approached him while he was doing something and asked him, “Why did you comment on me like that, it’s kind of unfair and inconsiderate of you, I was tired and making an effort to clean our house. You know I’m not into homemaking and I’m just doing this for us.” “Then hubby said, “Sorry, iba kasi yung dating ng request mo eh.” I replied,”Then what should I do? This is my natural voice.””Hindi ko rin alam eh.” I said, “I’m not always like that naman eh” to which he answered, “No you’re not, madalas kang ganun.”
I can really tell that he has been bothered on how I make a request to him when it comes to household chores. Maybe something’s different about me because I can be really doting and malambing especially when I want something from him, LOL.
I’ve forgotten about it until that incident was repeated. Just last night, after a whole day of family outing I made a request to hubby telling him, “Paki scrape ng mga maruming plato tapos paki organize na rin, ako na maghuhugas.” Then again he said, “wala man lang kalambing lambing.” My initial reaction was still the same, I got pissed off again.
So this morning, I again approached him and told him, “Bakit mo ba ko kino-commentan ng ganyan? Nung una I was in the middle of doing something, then last night, napagod ako magbantay kay Y. Kung sabihan kaya kitang wag kang maging malumanay magsalita, gagawin mo yun?” Then he mused as if considering my argument when he finally said, “Siguro ok na ko kung magsasabi ka ng ‘please’ kahit anong tono.” Then with half annoyance and half amusement I yelled teasingly at him, “PLEASE!!!”
So okay, maybe I’m different when I make my personal requests and house chores requests. Coz when I ask for something personal I would go my way to caressing him and speaking to him dotingly, much like a mistress to her sugar daddy. And when it’s about household chores I am stern and straightforward, just like a mayordoma to a house boy, LOL. But can I be like the former whenever I ask him around the house? Maybe, I’ll try.
Oh yeah, i’m guilty. Feeling ko naman malambing akong tao and patient etc. but there are really times when nagsusungit ako dahil sa dami ng ginagawa. Like you, I will try 🙂
serene shikukeza says
I can feel you Nova. It’s hard to be “malambing” when you are really tired. Honestly, I just have a moment of silence I don’t talk to them when I am not yet done with chores. Minsan kase when I involve him with chores he would say, “I can do anything except household chores”. What else is to do except them diba? Hay! Maybe we have to be PATIENT enough and MAHIRAP na gawin.
It’s really hard to say PLEASE especially when you’re super tired and preoccupied. But I guess your hubby’s making lambing na rin. Pero diba yung paki, form of please na rin yun? hehe…
This entry really did put a smile/grin on my face. I guess every mom can relate – that our husbands sometimes forget that we get tired, too.
Serene’s right. It’s hard to make lambing when you’re burned out because of those household chores na mukhang hindi maubos-ubos. Hehehe.. Pero with your post napaisip ako kasi my hubby told me once: Kailangan ba talaga kapag may ginagawa ka eh may gagawin din ako?
Kasi more more utos ako sa kanya kapag gumagawa ako sa house. Hihihi! I’ll try my best na lang not to make utos kung kaya ko naman. Besides, he’s working his ass off 6 times a week tapos utos pa’ko pag rest day niya. 😀
Nova Cruz says
You have a point sis Krisna, I actually understand husbands who want to have a restful day and would ask wives to understand too the pressure and stresses that husbands go through during the whole week. For us naman, hubby works at home at hindi mabigat, so he knows he is expected din to help me on easy house chores. And for me, I need to use a softer tone sa pag-uutos, LOL.
Pero I know other husbands who are working din, but at home yung isa naglalaba, yung isa naman nag-aalaga ng bata. Hands down sa mga husbands na ito. But at the end of the day, it’s just a matter of accepting who your husband is.
We are on the same boat. I think we get easily pissed off especially if we are tired and stressed by all these chores.