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by Nova Cruz, M.A.

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The Art of Submission: My own journey

May 22, 2012 by Nova Cruz Leave a Comment

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On house transferring

I shared last time in my blog about the predicament that Melbert and I went through. I want us to move somewhere and rent our own space. It has been a struggle for me as I was having a hard time maintaining my privacy and space from my in-laws. But now I’m glad that everything’s going fine and that I am enjoying my private little world.

No, we didn’t move as one might expect. He just talked to his parents. Not to move yet is his final decision and honestly, I don’t know when is it gonna be. And for the past few months, I’m actually learning to drop that issue of mine and just accept the fact that maybe, we will settle here until we grow old.

We live one block away from my in-laws and their business store in which they go everyday is on the ground floor of our house. We live in the second and third floor.

I presented to him in a calm way my issues and concerns and as to why moving to another place is important to me and our family. And after hearing me out, Melbert made his decision, and that is he doesn’t want us to move out yet. As the head of the family, he has the last say on major family matters.

But I can choose to be a rebellious or submissive wife. I can do things that will make him uncomfortable to the point of making him give in or I can just respect it. I can be stubborn and resume my cause to finally have my way or I can just accept it. I can badger and nag him so I can win or I can just have peace with it. Of course I chose all the latter.

On homemaking

Homemaking has never been a part of my vocabulary. During school days I trained myself to become competitive, making good grades and involving myself on extra curricular activities. And during my work and corporate life I learned to weather through the stress and pressure which my job has on me.

And now here I am, inside the four corners of our house, totally clueless on housekeeping and on how to go about it. But striving to become a submissive wife, I started to accept it and embrace it. I am now building my home management system. I still haven’t arrived there, but I’m making progress.

On homeschooling 

I’m not really into homeschooling, either that or the traditional is fine with me. But actually, the traditional schooling is more convenient for me because I will not have to plan lessons plus it will give me more time for myself.

But since Melbert believes so much on the promises of homeschooling, he’s very much determined to move to that direction. And as a wife striving to be submissive, I will honor it. Besides, he promised to help me.

These are just some of the incidences of my submission journey, there are still others, some are like a piece of cake, some are not.

Does this make me an expert? NO. I can only strive to achieve that perfection but will never, in my lifetime arrive there. Does this make me feel like a slave? NO. Because I believe following God’s Word on submission will give me freedom and I know our marriage will reap blessings. Does this make submission an easy job? NO. But with God’s help I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.

More from my site

  • How to Deal with Unsolvable Marital Problems
  • General Tips To a Happy Marriage For Single and Married Women
  • 6 Common Experiences of Filipina Breadwinner Wives
  • Making Love: Spontaneous or Scheduled
  • “If I am upset, let me be upset.”
  • On Being Boyfriend-Girlfriend Forever

Filed Under: Marriage, Marriage Care Tagged With: art-of-marriage

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Hi I’m Nova

I’m  a wife to a loving husband and a mom to two lovely children.
I began counseling and writing about marriage last 2012. I completed my masters degree in Counseling Psychology  from Ateneo de Manila University. I was also trained in Gottman’s Couples Therapy Method. 
At present, I am only offering offline chat consultation/counseling on donation basis.
If you need to consult with me, feel free to message me on my FB page.

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